I am the first to admit that when I am writing about bad sex, a lot of what I complain about seems obvious to me. Relax, have fun with it....how hard is that, really?
The more I talk to people, the more I realize how common sense is still pretty uncommon, even when it comes to getting off. That something as simple as just enjoying yourself is somehow ridiculously over complicated, whether by insecurity, bad advice, or one too many copies of Cosmo.
But somehow, even in my wildest dreams, I never thought that this would be something that I would have to be writing. Deep breath, here goes.
You should be awake during sex.
A lot of what I write is opinion, musings, personal preference, up for debate. This one most definitely isn't. In fact, it bears repeating.
You should be awake during sex.
It isn't adorable to pass out while bumping uglies. It isn't like when a small pet falls asleep in your arms, when everybody gets to coo about how comfortable Fluffy must be with you. It doesn't represent a new level in your relationship, it doesn't suggest a deeper emotional connection.
All it suggests is either a sex life in serious need of some passion, or possibly the beginnings of a drinking problem. (For the record, I am more forgiving of alcoholism than boredom.)
I don't know when, exactly, people started to think that there was something cute about passing out while balls deep, but I think I'll blame Third Eye Blind.
"How do I get back there, to the place where I fell asleep inside you"
You don't want to. Moving on.
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